Stuck in a what should I do situation?

Have you ever been in a friendship in which you don’t know if it is still genuine or if turned toxic? This situations turn into emotional draining one and simply overwhelming through out time. Red flags are more known in relationships, for example when you meet a new guy/girl you have to be aware of any ”Red flag” to know if it is a good partner. The same thing applies for friends and it is as important or even more than a relationship. Being in the look out for red flags does not make you paranoid, it simply makes you a person who wants to pick wisely who you are surrounding yourself with. It is important to be aware because then you will have to figure out how you want to address them.

A red flag is something that you experience that simply does not align with your values and goals in life. In a friendship we expect love, respect, trust, and simply genuine company. We don’t want someone who is just there for their own good. Sometimes you can try to work it out if something feels off because there is so much care in the friendship that if it has a strong foundation it can be worked out. Although if it is something constant that you can’t handle anymore and it is simply draining you then you have to put a stop to it.

5 red flags to keep an eye out for

The friendship is one sided:

A friendship has 2 sides, both care and put effort into the relationship. It should not feel like they are only there when it is something that only benefits them. They dismiss your problems and want you to pay attention to theirs. Meaning both should be there for each other and if it starts feeling like it is not that way anymore you should talk to them how you feel.

It feels like it’s a competition not a friendship:

This is a major red flag, it is one that drains the most. When you start feeling like there is a constant competition on who looks better, who does it better, who does it first, or simply who wins thats a no no. That is not a friendship, that is a competition on who is the best. Either try to talk about it and find what is triggering it, or simply say I am sorry but I can’t deal with this.

It seems like when you are in your lowest they feel their best:

This is something that happens a lot, especially in female friendships. It links with the competition red flag. Meaning when one of the friends feels their worst, or failed in someway the other one feeds of it and gets satisfaction over it. This is because the other one knows that they ”Won” or simply loves seeing their friend fail. DROP THEM babe, that is just not okay.

They don’t take responsibilities for their actions:

This means that they either avoid showing their weakness or simply don’t find anything wrong with their actions. Maybe it is a one time thing, but if it keeps happening then you might want to really think about it.

You can’t trust or be yourself with them

You can’t be yourself with them because you have found that they make fun of you in a bad way or simply use things that they know about you to embarrass you in-front of others to make themselves look better. This makes you loose trust and distance yourself. You should reconsider your friendship if this is a common pattern in yours.

Everyone has their own ”red flags”, meaning you might look for different ones and others might too. These are some that are really important.

Pick your friends wisely babes.

Xoxo,

Mar